Pacheco Family Christmas Card

Hey! Hi! Hello! I’m still alive and still have a blog and still want to share all things “lifestyle” with you guys haha. I don’t even know what a “lifestyle” blog is honestly. I just know I don’t have a designated fashion blog or food blog specifically so I’ll define it as lifestyle and there you have it! I currently smell like spit up and haven’t changed out of my pajamas today and it’s 4pm. Life of a new Mom trying to work 40 hours a week! Just keeping it real on my lifestyle blog!

This is as good as my Christmas cards get. I don’t do Christmas cards and don’t know if I ever will to be honest haha. James finished his first semester of dental school and did so well…we’re super proud of him! We all had a few weeks of high stress because of those dang exams. Holden and I left to Utah so we could have some help and some social interaction while James locked himself away to study. Being a dental wife is hard. Being a dental wife and mama to a newborn is hard. Being a dental wife, mama to a newborn, and working full time is HARD! I have been struggling with some postpartum depression, so coming to Utah really helped distract my mind a bit and I have loved being surrounded by many friends and family.

I didn’t think I would be one to struggle with this, but it hit me kind of hard and I don’t feel it is often talked about among others. I suddenly felt as if I lost my place in this world. Totally had a bit of an identity crisis. Even writing that sounds a little extreme but it’s truly how I felt and I am still trying to work through some of these feelings. Don’t get me wrong, I recognize my blessings and am thankful beyond belief!

James and I were up late last night talking and one thing mentioned was how blessed we both feel to have such amazing friends and family in our lives. People who instantly loved and accepted Holden, who we were so eager to have become a part of our world. He changed our lives in all the best ways and we are so blessed to be his parents. We would do anything for him. He didn’t just become a part of our world, he became our world!

We love Columbus and we love our home there. I never imagined I’d live in OHIO. When you’re from the west and live next to a mountain range, Ohio sounds like a foreign country haha. A flat, boring foreign country. But I actually love it more than I thought I would to be honest. I also love the proximity to surrounding states and am eager to explore more of the East coast! I love our friends we’ve made there and am glad we are homeowners of the best little home for Holden to grow up in. One we have made and will continue to make our own.

I am excited for Christmas with Holden. To watch his eyes light up as he experiences new things. It’s my favorite thing! And one of my favorite quotes of all time… “If we could see the world through the eyes of a child, we would see the magic in everything.” I truly believe that. One of my favorite things about being a mom is that even though I don’t remember experiencing things for the first time as a baby, I get to watch Holden go through it! I am excited to teach him new things and help him grow and become something incredible. He’s already been such a light and joy to all those around him! Seriously don’t know what I would do without him.

I can’t believe it is almost 2018! Mind blown. Thanks to our friend Mike Biggins (look him up on insta) we have the best photos of our family of three.

Wishing all of you an amazing Christmas and a happy new year!

Holden’s Birth Story

Our perfect Holden James Pacheco entered this world on Sept. 8, 2017 at 10:17 PM after a 16- hour labor, weighing 8lbs 2oz and 20.5 inches long. My Dr suggested a scheduled induction on his due date. We went in at 6am that morning. The nurse checked my cervix, verifying I was dilated to 3cm and 75% effaced. They informed me that my cervix was tilted which is why my body wasn’t going into labor on its own. My water was bulging – but because of the location of the cervix, it wouldn’t break on its own. They used what’s called a foley balloon, inserted that inside the cervix which dilates it slightly then when they pull it out, it centers it. Fortunately I only had to have it in for an hour.

After pulling the foley balloon out, they checked my cervix again which was then in a great location and dilated to 4cm. The next step was to break my water – because it was already bulging and baby was so low, they were worried about breaking the water as they didn’t know the location of his cord. We waited for about two hours and eventually the doctor felt confident enough to break my water and they started me on pitocin to cause contractions and further dilate me. I dilated to a 7 really quickly and was having super strong contractions so things were looking good and I got my epidural. We kept going on pitocin and I kept having contractions but baby’s heart rate began to drop a bit, so they had me laying on one side because his heart would do better on that side. The epidural either didn’t work fully or settled weird because the right half of my body was numb but I was feeling a LOT of pain in my left side, as if the epidural didn’t work on one whole side.

The anesthesiologist came in to check my epidural and essentially re-did it so that I would be numb. He gave me too much and I became far TOO numb. didn’t know that was possible giving birth, but trust me it is. I would have rather gone no epidural than to be as numb as I was during this time. They upped the pitocin after he re-did my epidural and all at once things started happening very quickly – I immediately dilated to a 10, 100% effacement, baby dropped into the birth canal, and I was too numb to do ANYTHING. The contractions started stressing Holden out, because he wasn’t handling the contractions as well and his heart rate kept dropping lower and lower, the nurses kept trying different things to try and up his heart rate any way they could and even inserted a liquid that mimicked the amniotic fluid which would just go in and drain right out of me.

At one point his heart rate dropped so low we almost lost him. The entire NICU team entered my room and were ready to prep me for an emergency C section. They gave me a shot with some form of medicine to stop all contractions and kept flipping me from side to side to try and up his heart rate any way they could. I just remember feeling SO helpless with how numb I was. I heard a “sweetie, do you think you can rotate…” “Okay Nicole we are going to try this now…” (multiple times) and I literally could not do anything. I was sooo scared and couldn’t stop crying and shaking because I was so worried we were going to lose him. After a while and in a specific position, his heart rate went up and started regulating again. They didn’t want me to push and didn’t want me back on pitocin again (though I had been dilated to a 10) because they were worried he just wasn’t going to tolerate it well.

We waited a long time, another two hours or so before they decided to have me start trying again and informed me I only had an hour and a half to push because the baby can only be in the birth canal so long before they don’t survive. They put me on an extremely low dose of Pitocin and contractions began to drop his heartbeat again (later discovered the cord was wrapped around his neck). They had to take me off pitocin again, I was having little to no contractions but had to push anyway and my extremely high dosage epidural had completely worn off by then (hours later) so I literally felt everything and was pushing with nearly no help from my body. At one point I remember the doctor saying, we are going to use the vacuum on him, one tug is all I like to do and we will see how much lower that gets him. They did that and then I remember the doctor saying “okay three more pushes and if he doesn’t come out we will have to do a c-section, we are out of time.”

I prayed hard and literally pushed with everything in me. I had to have a second degree episiotomy as well to help. I even said out loud “I feel defeated, I can’t do this.” But the craziest part is I could feel how much lower he was in the birth canal and the nurses kept commenting on how much hair he had, and that was encouraging and kept me trying as hard as I could. The nurses called the other teams to prep them for my C section and I just was crying thinking I had failed (not that a C section is a failure by any means, but this is just how I was feeling after I had been trying so hard for hours but couldn’t do it). I somehow managed to push him out on those last three tries. It was seriously such a blessing he made it out the way he did or we may have lost him.

These moments were by far the scariest, most emotional moments of my entire life. They placed him on top of my chest immediately and I couldn’t do anything else besides stare at him and just cry. I look back on these photos and cry again because I am just so amazed – it almost feels like a dream. He is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and we love him so much! He’s such a blessing to our family and has been such a joy to us this past week. I am so thrilled to be his mom.

 

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And here’s our little Holden, a week later!

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Xo. Nicole

 

Staples for Fall

The biggest challenge with being pregnant is finding maternity clothes that I really love. I have been fortunate enough to find a few things, but for me it wasn’t worth spending a ton of money on a lot of items because I knew I was only going to use them for a bit.

I miss wearing high-waisted & mid-rise jeans the most! Right before I found out I was pregnant, I thrifted a pair of high waisted Levi’s and added a little bit of distress to them. I wore them maybe once or twice and then started growing and couldn’t wear them anymore. With limited funds I am always working to refine my wardrobe. It’s not always easy but I love when I find a really good thrifted item and something I know not everyone will be wearing! I have yet to check out thrift stores here in Columbus but will also be excited to do so when I can actually try stuff on again!

Here are a few staple items that I love and plan to wear this fall: A good Camel colored coat or long jacket, loafers of any kind, high waisted/mid-rise denim.

What are some of your staple items?

Xo. Nicole

36 Week Update

We are just over 36 weeks now! A couple of comments I’ve received this week I haven’t yet before:

“You look like you’re ready to pop!”
“You are all belly, girl. I wish my belly had been that big when I was pregnant.” Compliment? Unsure.

There have been others but can’t quote them word-for-word…. they have just been comments making me realize the due date is quickly approaching. Baby is sinking lower and lower – he’s always sat low, but this is no joke now. The pressure is almost unbearable and literally just standing up hurts now. Two weeks ago we went to the zoo and walked a total of over 4 miles… there’s no way I could be doing anything like that at this point in time. Crazy how rapidly he’s growing now and how quickly it’s changing. A friend let me borrow her belly band – absolutely life altering! I should have been using it like three weeks ago at least haha!

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We celebrated our 5th anniversary on Friday. We got to hang out all day because I had the day off of work, which I was super thankful for! We talked about going on a short trip but because I am super pregnant, that plan didn’t really work out. So instead, we are having a baby and purchasing a home for our 5-year anniversary! Which i’d much prefer anyway.

Our entire day was centered around food. We ate at a few places that all offered a lot of gluten free options and it was wonderful. So happy to have found some local places here in Columbus and am excited to find more over time.

Outfit Details:
Shirt: H&M Basics
Pants: Asos Maternity
Shoes: Steve Madden

Xo. Nicole

North Market

There is a fun little spot in Columbus called North Market. It’s an indoor market with a variety of local shops/places to eat. We had so much fun exploring the market yesterday, and I couldn’t believe we hadn’t been there sooner. We had some amazing Macrons from Pistacia Vera, My favorites were the toasted coconut, vanilla bean, and coffee. We also had a mint one – which was a fun flavor to try but not necessarily a favorite. We had some stuffed mushrooms from Pastaria Secunda, and found a cute place called Little Eater with healthy foods and plenty of gluten free options. We will definitely be going back to try additional places.

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It was fun checking out a couple of new places and spending more time downtown before baby boy arrives! Just over 35 weeks now and couldn’t be more excited to meet him in less than 5! I am definitely getting sick of being pregnant and though I have loved him being in my tummy and will miss feeling him move in there, I will be happiest having him here with us.

Xo. Nicole

Hi Ohio!

We have had a lot of fun exploring our new home! We really like it here so far – there are so many houses in Columbus that have a lot of character and there are so many we are completely in love with. We are currently looking to purchase a home to start our family. With baby boy joining us in less than two months, we are really looking forward to having a place of our own & we can hopefully can get a dog too!

Columbus

Xo. Nicole

32 Week Update

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I have been pretty bad at updating the blog with so much going on recently – the move to Columbus, adventuring in our new city, and we took a week long trip to D.C. to visit some of our friends there and had so much fun. Makes me excited to explore more cities on the East Coast!

We have been trying to purchase a home here in Columbus and were hoping to to do so before the baby comes but because the process is so involved, there is no way it will happen before he arrives. Because of this, we figured we would work on getting our nursery all set up. We were able to purchase some fun things for it and I am excited to do a nursery reveal in the near future and even more excited for baby to make his arrival! Less than two months and I’m going to be a mom, ahh!

I’ve been wanting to cut my hair for a long time and decided to just go for it. It was liberating! Was time to stop caring about other’s opinions and just do what I want to do. I used to be more this way but unfortunately it’s easy to get wrapped up in the worldly aspect of fearing what others may think. #momhairdontcare

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Overall I have been feeling really good, just getting more and more exhausted, it’s getting harder to breathe normally, and my back hurts when I wake up each morning. I have found that going to bed really late helps with that…weird I know. But I am in bed for fewer hours and the quality of sleep I get is generally better than if I go to bed earlier and toss and turn all night or wake up at like 5am having to pee with a sore back!

Just when I think it’s not possible for my belly to get any bigger, within the next few days it’s visibly a LOT bigger! At my last appointment a couple of days ago, my doctor said that the baby is still head down which is great and commented on the fact that I don’t have any stretch marks – woohoo! We have two more appointments before doing another ultrasound at week 37, just to see baby one more time before he comes!

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Top: Brandy Melville
Pants: Asos Maternity
Shoes: Hope Ave
Hat: Brixton

Xo. Nicole